Hey there guys, I am sort of back from the dead. *laughs* But on a serious note, Midterms are next week and I have so much to do but I took time to do this post about "Bottling up your feelings". What I mean is, don't bottle up your feelings and then in the end you're just gonna break down and cry.
In case you guys don't know, I come from a broken family. The thing about broken families that it makes you stronger, if there are advantages to it of course there has to be disadvantages to it. Let me tell you, there are so much disadvantages that I could think of that I should write down.
I just wanted you guys to know how much it sucks to be part of a broken family when you know you're the only who knows. My family thinks that I am very naive, and I am going to be honest that most of the time I am. Every time I try to tell people why I am acting the way I act, they won't listen to me and they would think because I just want their attention.
That's what hurts me the most.
The only reason to why I am things that aren't "right", it is because I am trying to cover up the pain that I am feeling. So with that being said, every time I hide the pain I am feeling and it gets bottled up in a few weeks time I will break down and I will start crying 'cause honestly its okay not to be okay.
It's something I learned as I got older.
Another reason to why I bottle my feelings up and then I break down, people judge me and I just don't show it when I'm actually hurt.
I am the sore thumb of the family, want to know why?
1st reason:
I am short.
2nd reason:
I am fat.
3rd reason:
I am not athletic.
4th reason:
I am the only one who didn't study in Alabang (I didn't go to De La Salle Zobel nor did I go to Paref Woodrose; my brothers and 2 of my cousins study in Zobel, and I have a cousin from my dad's sde who studies in Woodrose)
5th reason:
I am not that smart but I'm alright
6th reason:
I am lazy but the thing is when I take my time, I really take my time. I don't rush myself 'cause when I do I might forget something.
7th reason:
People think I'm a kid when I'm 18 years old but the reason why people think I am a kid, it is because I'm a kid at heart.
8th reason:
I love to write, but some think that I send to others and think that it contains secrets, which it does but I keep to myself. It's like a journal/diary if you want to call it that.
9th reason:
I am a college student who is taking up Multimedia Arts, most of the time with my course we use the computer/laptop and my dad thinks I am using it for my social medias when I obviously need it to stay in reach with my blockmates.
I think I will stop there.
Don't bottle up your feelings, darlings. Learn how to stand up for yourselves when you know you had enough bullshit..
Day 21 question:
How do you hope your future will turn out?
I hope that it would turn out the way I imagined it would be, which of course, I wouldn't tell you guys.
Day 22 question:
Ten things about you that people won't except
1. I don't study in De La Salle University (People's first school that pops into their mind when they find that I am in college)
2. I sleep with a stuffed toy pillow
3. I can sing but I can rap better
4. I am secretly gay
5.I am secretly hipster
6.I have internet friends
7.I like turtles
8.I have a Youtube channel
9.I sort of believe in bad luck and/or karma
10.I am from a broken family
xx
Bella
I just wanted you guys to know how much it sucks to be part of a broken family when you know you're the only who knows. My family thinks that I am very naive, and I am going to be honest that most of the time I am. Every time I try to tell people why I am acting the way I act, they won't listen to me and they would think because I just want their attention.
That's what hurts me the most.
The only reason to why I am things that aren't "right", it is because I am trying to cover up the pain that I am feeling. So with that being said, every time I hide the pain I am feeling and it gets bottled up in a few weeks time I will break down and I will start crying 'cause honestly its okay not to be okay.
It's something I learned as I got older.
Another reason to why I bottle my feelings up and then I break down, people judge me and I just don't show it when I'm actually hurt.
I am the sore thumb of the family, want to know why?
1st reason:
I am short.
2nd reason:
I am fat.
3rd reason:
I am not athletic.
4th reason:
I am the only one who didn't study in Alabang (I didn't go to De La Salle Zobel nor did I go to Paref Woodrose; my brothers and 2 of my cousins study in Zobel, and I have a cousin from my dad's sde who studies in Woodrose)
5th reason:
I am not that smart but I'm alright
6th reason:
I am lazy but the thing is when I take my time, I really take my time. I don't rush myself 'cause when I do I might forget something.
7th reason:
People think I'm a kid when I'm 18 years old but the reason why people think I am a kid, it is because I'm a kid at heart.
8th reason:
I love to write, but some think that I send to others and think that it contains secrets, which it does but I keep to myself. It's like a journal/diary if you want to call it that.
9th reason:
I am a college student who is taking up Multimedia Arts, most of the time with my course we use the computer/laptop and my dad thinks I am using it for my social medias when I obviously need it to stay in reach with my blockmates.
I think I will stop there.
Don't bottle up your feelings, darlings. Learn how to stand up for yourselves when you know you had enough bullshit..
Day 21 question:
How do you hope your future will turn out?
I hope that it would turn out the way I imagined it would be, which of course, I wouldn't tell you guys.
Day 22 question:
Ten things about you that people won't except
1. I don't study in De La Salle University (People's first school that pops into their mind when they find that I am in college)
2. I sleep with a stuffed toy pillow
3. I can sing but I can rap better
4. I am secretly gay
5.I am secretly hipster
6.I have internet friends
7.I like turtles
8.I have a Youtube channel
9.I sort of believe in bad luck and/or karma
10.I am from a broken family
xx
Bella
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